Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Welcome to Summer Vacation. Sorry if if sucks

The reality of summer vacation never quite equals the fantasy. At least in my mind anyway. Being a teacher I have enjoyed the spoils of summer vacation- the spoils being spending time with my kids, lazy days by the pool, hanging out and just enjoying being a mom. Well, at least until the inevitable barrage of "I'm bored" and He's touching me" begins. Yet even then- I can honestly say I loved summer vacation for quite a few years.
The family that plays together

Then- last year - our financial situation was shit. I needed to go to work. I wasn't happy about it. I started by looking for a bartending job, but because I wasn't 22 with an ass you could bounce a quarter off it didn't pan out. I ended up working in a deli at our local grocery store- working crazy shifts like 1:30-10:00 PM. That meant the kiddos were home alone and mom wasn't around to do ANYTHING with them. I was sad. I was mad. But it was what it was and we all had to deal.

Now I am back in my chosen career- Preschool Teacher Extraordinaire.  But- where I normally wouldn't be working over the summer- now I am. And- I am out of my class and in with the school age kids. I don't mind- I will be out of the school most days on field trips- a good and bad thing as I am taking a bunch of other kids places that I am not taking mine 1) because they are so damn expensive and 2) well- there is no other thing- it is truly all about the $$$. 

I began stressed out- I was so worried who was gonna take care of Noah- 8-9 hours 5 days a week is a lot to ask of Tweenzilla- and she wants to do stuff too.  Then a miracle- Noah's teacher offered to watch him. I was blown away- she and her family are utterly amazing and BONUS- like 10 minutes from my work. SCORE!  And now Tweenzilla (soon to be TEENzilla) can have the house to herself to do her art, watch TV, take random bike rides and just hang out.  So I am very relieved- at least until summer school starts for the boy..I will cross that bridge when I have to.

Another check in the plus column- my boss also has 4 kids and she knows how important it is for me to NOT work until 6:00 every day ( since I also have a 45 minute drive home that is great) and I will have non field trip days off. Of course- there aren't many non field trip days- but I will take what I can get.

Two summer birthdays can be fun
But I still have this mother's guilt that I am not with my kids - therefore I am a bad mom (especially as I take care of other people's kids). I mean summer vacation was just a lazy time..really. Driving kiddos around- feeding all of Tweenzilla's friends when they are over, that kind of stuff.  We aren't a family that travels for various reasons. Noah is interesting to take new places to say the least, and having to take out a third mortgage on the house for a family vacay is not gonna happen. Both of their birthdays are also in the summer- so we usually do a party or something fun for them along those lines.
Up North Michigan is AMAZING

But I still wish I was HOME. Even if we don't go anywhere special- maybe a trip or two Up North,  or a baseball game. But the time I get to spend with them is priceless and they are growing so fast it is quickly approaching the years where they REALLY don't want anything to do with me. My oldest is 20..been there, done that.

Tigers Baseball!!

So I am appeasing myself by compiling a list of reasons why summer sucks- well except for ice cream, not having to wear socks, and more hours in the day. Hoping it makes me feel better.

1) It's hot and humid. 

2) My hair is a mess

3) I hate the way I look in a bathing suit

4)I still have to work

5)Despite the aforementioned working- I am still broke.

6) I have to shave my legs  every single day

Well- that didn't work- I am still feeling like throwing a pity party.  I need more wine.