Monday, December 19, 2011

Dear Santa

Dear Santa:

I won't say I have been necessarily GOOD this year- but I certainly haven't been BAD either. I gave of myself, my time and talents, and there are just a couple of things I would like for Christmas- if you can swing them that is.

1) Family members that pick up their own crap- without being told 10 times.

2) The student loan money I so desperately need so I can finish this damn degree and start actually making real money in a career I love

3) A successful weight loss plan that doesn't involve hair falling out stress or illegal drugs. 

4) My husband to stop asking me what needs to be done around the house. YOU LIVE HERE!!! FIGURE IT OUT!!!

5) Teenage daughter to stop destroying the 5K I invested in her mouth by not wearing her retainers. 

6) Same teenage daughter to stop being so against showering and cleaning her room.

7) (nearly) 21 year old TO MOVE THE HELL OUT!!  

8) 9 year old to finally learn to tie his shoes. Autism, schmautism  he CAN do it.

9) Asshole neighbors to get their illegal landscaping leveled so my back yard won't rival Lake Michigan this spring. 

10) Extended family to stop treating us like lepers and actually hang out with MY kids once in awhile- without us having to resort to begging and planning a year in advance. 

I know you are busy, and a lot of folks are asking for a lot of things. This list is in order by priority- so let's just say Top 5?  I get screwed every year for my birthday and Mother's Day- so it would be nice if I could be recognized this year.  Just a little- I mean Christmas is all for my kiddos- and I don't want to steal their thunder- so just a wee bit- ok?

I made some pretty awesome cookies for ya- and screw the milk- I am leaving a bottle of my favorite wine for you this year. Just don't drink too much and ...ummm... sleigh?