One pissed off white suburban mom

You know what? I really want to thank U.S. Education Secretary, Arne Duncan, for pointing out that the only reason I am against Common Core is because I am a white suburban mom who has  realized my kids aren't geniuses. WHEW! Thanks for that Mr. Duncan. Here I was thinking that Common Core was a reboot of No Child Left Behind, another one size fits all set of educational standards that failed spectacularly. But clearly, as you so succinctly pointed out- it is ME who is missing the point- what with all my "helicopter mom" antics and happy ignorance of my children's poor education.  I am thrilled that you find it "“fascinating” that some of the opposition to the Common Core State Standards has come from “white suburban moms who — all of a sudden — their child isn’t as brilliant as they thought they were, and their school isn’t quite as good as they thought they were.”  (P.S. what kind of sentence is this? Seriously- YOU are in charge of education?)

(If you haven't read the article- please read it here- I am not exaggerating or joking)

I was apparently completely wrong in thinking that the Common Core State Standards (CCSS) were developmentally inappropriate,  micro-managing attempt to guarantee that teachers will teach to the test and attempt to turn otherwise bright, imaginative students into fact regurgitating drones that are unhappy, frustrated and worst of all- NOT LEARNING. I guess I was wrong about the fact that CCSS is a program that is paid for by billionaires, and "researched" by people who have zero educational background.  And I must have misunderstood that  states have been threatened  to implement this very flawed set of standards or lose federal funds.
And when you said "The Common Core has become a rallying cry for fringe groups that claim it is a scheme for the federal government to usurp state and local control of what students learn. An op-ed in the New York Times called the Common Core “a radical curriculum.” It is neither radical nor a curriculum. … When the critics can’t persuade you that the Common Core is a curriculum, they make even more outlandish claims. They say that the Common Core calls for federal collection of student data. For the record, it doesn’t, we’re not allowed to, and we won’t. And let’s not even get into the really wacky stuff: mind control, robots, and biometric brain mapping"  were you referring to the DOE, February 2013 report that has pictures of the exact biometric devices you are claiming you can't use? I don't know about mind control- but YOUR department put this study out. (See page 44, article 11)  I am really confused now.  This coming from the same man who said that the best thing to happen to the education system in New Orleans was Hurricane Katrina. WHAT THE HELL??

And I must be completely delusional to think that white suburban mom's are the only concerned parents. Apparently no other race or ethnicity or socio-economic group  is worried and angry about CCSS. And dad's well- what do they even care?  Let's not even consider special needs students who will be expected to perform right alongside their peers, regardless of ability. I mean- your goal is "preparing for a global economy" - and apparently these children, the ones with autism, ADHD, dyslexia, etc. etc. etc. do not fit yours and your billionaire backers molds.

My kids may not be geniuses, but they are smart. They are capable of learning- yes, even my son with Autism. I have watched my daughter work her ass off to maintain an A average. She wasn't coddled, she wasn't told she was great no matter what she did. She was, and is held to a higher standard, and her hard work and perseverance and continually good  great report cards are evidence of that. I have watched my son work hard to understand concepts, and have modified curriculum for him, to help his differently functioning brain understand concepts. I do not feel like I was "punched in the gut" by the horribly low standards my kids were being held to. Because they weren't.   But maybe that is just my "delusional" belief.

Mr. Duncan- your rude, racist, sexist remarks are disgusting and have pissed off many, many people. Not just we white suburban moms. . And YOU are in charge of our children's education? It terrifies me to think where my very intelligent children will be when they graduate if this ridiculous set of standards continues to permeate and destroy our schools. Good teachers are leaving their jobs because

Back to school- hopes and fears. Hope 2012-A Blog Relay

"I can assure you there is no more powerful advocate for children than a parent armed with information and options."

Dr. Rod Paige, U.S. Secretary of Education (2001-2005)

When I read Slice of Humble's blog about hope this week, I was so inspired!  So here is my inspired blog, and my take on "Hope" 

It's August- which means school is just around the corner! There’s a buzz in the air that’s almost palpable. Parents all over town are humming with anticipation of what, for many of us is the most wonderful time of the year. That first day back to school!


In our family, it has been a constant juggling act between two very different age groups, dealing with no car, dealing with financial instability, and trying to keep The Boy engaged and throwing learning opportunities at him as well. It's not easy, and I should be glad that someone else gets to take over his education for the better part of the day in a few weeks.


But I am worried- because although he was supposed to be mainstreamed last year, the teacher decided "he wasn't doing as well as she would like" i.e. I can't handle him or give him the extra 5 minutes he needs on certain tasks. So he was put into a "categorical classroom" or "cross categorical classroom" or special ed to you and me. I wasn't happy about this turn of events- at his other school he had managed being completely mainstreamed, and had a wonderful teacher who worked WITH him, while also integrating him into the classroom. This has not been the case in the new school.


The "categorical/cross categorical classroom" is supposed to take a teacher with a certain endorsement, such as LD (learning disability) EI (emotionally impaired) CI (cognitively impaired) or HI (Hearing impaired) AI (Autistic impaired)- you get the picture- and put them with students who fit within their endorsements. Because most of these classrooms are "cross-categorical" a teacher with an LD endorsement will probably be teaching a classroom of kids with impairments across the board. Which means that in order to meet IEP goals- these teachers must work a lot harder, and these students will be missing support classes and specials like art, music etc. I think this cross categorical idea is crap. How does this best meet the needs of kids with disabilities in the least restrictive environment?


To top things off, after going all year with "he's doing good" I get his end of the year report card- and while he did pretty good in most areas - he didn't in others and NOTHING was ever said. And I pushed and pushed- wanting to make sure he was mainstreamed fully next year, AND with a certain teacher. I was told that yes , yes, of course- we agree with you. Then it was "oh well, we will see" and mama wasn't having any of that!


So next week, the phone calls and emails will start. Making sure he gets the teacher I want him to have, and that the "cross-categorical" classroom will be only used for support- NOT as a main classroom situation.


So what does this blog have to do with "Hope"? Everything. We all hope our children do well, make friends, and are happy, right? I am a parent who has to work her ass off on a DAILY basis to make sure these things happen. I am a parent of an autistic child- so I work, and advocate and fight for every little thing. Not that I didn't do the same for the other kids- just not on such an intense level.


I have discovered strength and patience I never knew I had. So much so, I am finishing my own degree in Special Education so I can help those kids so many schools just ignore.


Step 1: Write a blog post about hope & publish it on your blog.
Step 2: Invite one (or more!) bloggers to do the same.

 Step 3: Link to the person who recruited you (me, in this case) at the top of the post, and the people you're recruiting at the bottom of the post.
Melanie Crutchfield will be holding "Closing Ceremonies" around August 10 and will gather up little snippets from people that wrote about hope, so make sure you link back to her as the originator of the relay

My picks are:

Homestyle Mama (with a side of Autism)

Grape Jelly on Pizza

Dad v. Autism

Inclusion or Seclusion? What are we teaching our kids about Special Education?

I was having a conversation with the boys in the after school program I run yesterday. We were talking about random stuff,  zombies, food, basketball- all things 9-11 year old boys like to talk about.  The conversation turned to a boy in the special ed. class, who  had a major meltdown at school- screaming for almost an hour-  and then to the rest of the class in general.

They turned to me and asked this question:

"Ms. Dawn- why do some of the kids in Mrs. B's class even come to school? They don't even know

what is going on- are they even learning anything?"

First - I am thrilled that they are comfortable enough with me to ask this, second- this was not said in a cruel or mean way- it was a serious question.  I asked them what made them think this? And they said- not all of the kids- just some of them,(there are a couple of lower functioning kids- little to no speech, etc) couldn't learn anything so why were they at school. 

I pondered their question for a minute- thinking of the best way to answer them. As I said- they weren't being mean, but they truly felt this way and needed an honest answer.  

"Since I don't teach the kids on a regular basis- I can't say what they do or do not learn, but I can say that everyone learns, just maybe at a different pace, and maybe not the exact thing you might be learning."

They were quiet for a second, and then they said, OK Ms Dawn! Can we have snack now?  So did what I say make sense? Did they internalize it to ask their parents about later? Did they care at all? I have to think they did care- or they wouldn't have asked in the first place. I kept my answer short and sweet- when dealing with 9-11 year old boys- anything longer or more detailed would have been completely tuned out. 

My heart was heavy though, this is what they see, what is modeled for them, what they base their perceptions on.  Kids learn what they see, and being that the special ed class at The Boy's school is completely self contained- the rest of the student population doesn't have much of a chance to deal with them, get to know them, develop any kind of tolerance or sensitivity towards them.  They are not considered a part of the general education population, despite the teacher's amazing enthusiasm and effort to make the class less stigmatized. But since the students attend maybe 2 gen. ed. classes, and specials like art, music, gym and computers, they are truly not an integral part of the school community. The other kids will say things like "So and so was in MY class for science today"- lending credence to my theory that the special needs kids- even the higher functioning kids- are not considered part of the school "family".  It makes me sad. 

My thoughts on how to remedy this? The teachers need to be collaborating more!  Inclusion is a tricky thing, but it seems to be the way education is going.  There needs to be MORE EDUCATION FOR THE EDUCATORS!  They need more professional development days that deal strictly with inclusion, and how to teach the student population how to react to and treat these kids. Whether it is an invisible special need, like autism, or a something the kids can SEE, like Down's.  Sure there are still going to be bullying issues- it's not a perfect world we live in, but this could go a long way towards making bullying a rare occurrence as opposed to an every day thing.

The  fact is, mainstream schools are expected to smilingly and graciously accept any child sent their way, no matter what their need. Even if everyone involved can see that it isn't necessarily best for anyone. If extra money and support was readily available, and this was done as a positive move for both the abled and disabled communities to have more interaction I would probably feel better about it. But as it stands, it is a political move forced upon already cash strapped schools with an awkward, unorganized and red taped process that leaves parents,teachers and administrators feeling frustrated. 

I just hope that at some point the value that these kids add to their school is universally accepted. Perhaps that's when real inclusion begins?

How will a $3,000 scholarship for education make a difference in my life?

If you read my blog you know I have been trying to finish my Special Education degree for a number of years now.  Work, kids, life and autism have always managed to get in my way. That and MONEY!! That's what it really all boils down to- the all mighty dollar!!!  And like most people- I never have any extra- and if by some crazy miracle I do- it most likely goes on my kids' backs, and wouldn't be enough to even buy a textbook. (Did you know you can RENT those now??)


3 years ago, I got a scholarship. It would allow me to take at least two classes a semester for a year. I unfortunately- in my giddy excitement ( I ADORE being a student) I didn't read that it was for Winter, Fall, Winter, Fall. No Spring/Summer. So- I took a spring/summer class, only to be very upset when I realized my mistake. I contacted the college and asked if there was ANY way I could substitute that Spring/Summer semester for the last Winter one. No. I couldn't. I still don't understand why- probably a punishment for being an idiot.

So- now I am into the college for almost 2K and it is the LAST bill I think to pay- what with keeping my lights on, food in the house and my mortgage paid- that seems like small potatoes. But I am desperately unhappy in my current job. I LOVE what I do- but I want my own class! I want to be helping kids just like The Boy- I want to be making a difference doing what I LOVE. So now the scholarship hunt begins.
(Don't even ask about FAFSA- been down that road- DENIED)

With a gazillion sites out there Broke Scholar,Scholarships.com,Education Connection,  and of course offerings from my university of choice (Wayne State- go Warriors!), each promising thousands of dollars to get an education, it's not HARD to apply. It just takes hours, days, weeks of sifting through, writing essays, (hence the title of this blog) and meeting deadlines.

I have applied for and wrote several  "short answer" essays- and when I read them I think- why WOULDN'T someone give me this scholarship? And then I remember- ohhhhh....because I am competing with all of the millions of 18-20 year old's just beginning their college careers, the millions of people retraining for a new career after losing their jobs in our shitty economy. But then- I try to look at the bright side- I want to be a SPECIAL EDUCATION TEACHER!! With an Autistic Spectrum Disorder endorsement. I know that so many schools need GOOD special ed teachers, I know I could find a job- especially with the endorsement.  So dammit- give me some MONEY!!

Then my neighbor asks me- do you ever wonder if it is worth it to finish your degree at this age- when someone 15 -20 years younger than me might be considered first. And I said NO- of course not! Because along with an education from a school of higher learning, I have many years of PRACTICAL experience that put me way ahead of some fresh faced young thing- that has no idea that walking into a special needs environment  means kids that don't speak, kids who can't control their bodies, kids who have violent outbursts, kids who need to have diapers changed, kids on the spectrum, kids with ADHD, kids that hit, kick, spit and cry.  Parents who look to you for guidance, support and help. Cuts in funding for already struggling programs, Grant writing (aka begging for money) and making do with what you have. A physical, and mentally challenging career that takes a special person to do, and do well.

You may ask- WHY IN THE FUCK WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THIS? Simple- because I love kids- all shapes, sizes and colors. And since beginning this journey with Autism- I have had an opportunity to meet so many different kids, with different issues, and they need someone like ME! I am vocal, I am tireless when it comes to advocating. I believe EVERY child can learn. What they NEED to learn and WHEN they need it.

This is why I need a paltry $3000. This is how a scholarship would make a difference in my life- so I could FINALLY  start to finish my education and  make a difference in  so many other's lives. So what if I am  starting at 40 years old? I have A LOT to give, A LOT of years to go.

So c'mon- show me the $$$$.  Pretty please??